I should give him space when he's angry and not pressure him to do anything.I was paying an hour for a woman to tell me I should completely change who I am so my anxiety would subside. Maybe, if I gave him space, he wouldn't make excuses as to why he couldn't hang out during the weekend.Maybe, if I sent him a nice text message during the day, he would stop messaging other girls on Tinder.

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Maybe, if I took him back for the third time, he wouldn't walk out of my apartment again when I told him I loved him.

I woke up every single day full of anxiety because something just didn't feel right.

Even if he did something nice, which was rare since he was “so busy with work,” I felt as if it wasn't genuine.

Everyone says you learn the most from your first love.

He or she is the person you tell people about years after it’s over because when you look back, you see how much you learned.

However, what happens when you put your first love and chronic anxiety in a room together? Every day, analyzing his every move absorbed my life and bombarded my brain.

For me, denial ensued — 11 months of it, to be exact. Every morning, I woke up happy and could not wait to talk to him and see him. I didn't want to be one of those girls who overanalyzed everything, but I felt as if I was going insane.

Everything was great, right until the honeymoon phase ended and the comfort stage began. I felt as if I could have become a Victoria's Secret model or the next Mark Zuckerberg and he still wouldn't have cared.

My first love happened to be my first relationship, and for me, the end of the honeymoon phase sent me into fight or flight mode. So, like anyone who suffers anxiety and is trying to make a relationship work, I took it upon myself to go seek professional help for an hour at my college's mental health clinic.

I was told my thoughts were normal and I should start exercising more to rid myself of the anxiety.

I should try and go to bed earlier and I should adopt a healthier lifestyle.